For this whole week I've been in a "I-hate-kids-why-did-I-become-a-teacher!" mood. I've been struggling to find the joy in teaching children. I genuinely like teaching English to adults. They want to be there and they are eager to learn. They also have a desire to converse with you. Most adults have had at least some exposure to English, either from 20 years ago in high school or from watching lots of movies. Children on the other hand... most of them are there because their parents want them to learn English. It's just more school to them and if they had a choice, they'd rather play all day than listen to an hour of English. It's also a struggle since they are learning English from scratch. Plus, I am most definitely an introvert and dislike noise. And, well, kids are noisy.
Over time I've been able to grow with some of the kids and get more comfortable with them. Out of all the elementary classes, I enjoy my Tuesday class the best. Probably because that one is the quietest and matches my personality. I definitely do much better with the older kids, from 6th grade on. Junior high is surprisingly the easiest to teach.
High school was one of my most difficult classes early on because they had a specific type of comprehension and conversation skills. They were also very awkward and shy. But after a few months, they have warmed up and are much less awkward. I think I'm also getting more confident with the textbook. We've incorporated Boggle into our lessons, which has been a great success. They love that game and it makes class a lot more fun. It's been so much more fun that now I am thinking of continuing the previous teacher's idea of a fun night/ministry. Half of the high school students are currently on an American tour, which is a sort of reverse missions trip. They go to America and they get ministered to. With that going on right now, and after they met Aaron, I'm thinking of continuing the ministry to them in some way. Not sure how yet. Possibly one fun night a month thing.
However, as for the children. In one of my classes, there is one particular girl that had been giving me a lot of attitude. She's rather inconsistent about it as well, which makes it more difficult. I've tried different approaches on her. Being stern. Being friendly. Giving special praises. So on. But last Sunday, when I said hi to her, she ignored me. To my face. That was the last straw and I was determined to talk to this little girl face to face. I first spoke to Junko about it since I would need a translator. However, when that day came, I found out that Junko had already spoken to her on my behalf. Well, I was disappointed that I didn't get the chance to speak to the child directly, but the child listened fortunately. She was even playful with me on the playground and we danced together (briefly). There was also an incident on the playground when her sister began to cry. The other girls continued to play, but her sister stayed by her side. It was quite sweet and it helped me to see that she's really a good girl.
Thursday class consistently been my most rowdy class. Probably coming in and starting exhausted was not a good way to kick off this class. However, since the begin of the new school year in April and a recent scolding, they have been very good. I've gotten used to their energy and personalities. Today, we even had a new student and it went very well.
So with this improvement does this mean I like kids? I know God is telling me to build relationships with these kids. And thankfully, that is unfolding now. Hopefully, as I continue to teach them and get to know them, I will come to see them as not (in the words of my grandpa) "gunfunnit kids!" but as real people. Maybe once that happens, this job will start to be rewarding.
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